Friday, June 21, 2013

Awkward

I did a funeral this morning, and it was awkward.  I frequently get calls from funeral homes asking me to do the funeral of a person who grew up Lutheran or was baptized Lutheran, or who might have sat next to a Lutheran person once in a movie theater, but who wasn't very religious. The family then wants a Lutheran funeral, which is fine, and usually they go OK.  It's always slightly awkward to only interact with people while you are burying their loved one, and to speak in a homily about someone you've never met.  Sometimes the families are really engaged and fill me in on stories about their loved one, other times, not so much.  It continually amazes me how so many families have nothing to say when asked about their family member.  I understand they are grieving and that makes things difficult.  I understand that every family has different dynamics.  I understand that if you didn't grow up in a family that went to church you are going to want me to choose scripture readings for you.  But lately it seems like most of these that I do involve an awkward conversation where I ask them to tell me about their loved one and I get a few mumbled responses in reply.  I'm also noticing that the obituaries are frankly pathetic.  The last 5 or so funerals I have done for non-members have literally all included some variation on this obituary:  Birth and death dates, who she married, and that she liked to garden.  Seriously?  8 or 9 decades of life and that's all you can say about your mother?  I'm not saying you should write a novel, and I know obits can get pricey, but can  you try to put some life into it?  I then have to give the most generic homily ever because I'm not going to stand up and say, well, she was a child of God who apparently liked to garden.  Today's was also awkward because the family clearly didn't want to be there.  No one participated in any way, even when things were printed out for them.  Not much eye contact.  And the sound system gave out, which means I had to basically yell for 20 minutes.  That did not help my bronchitis.
 
OK, enough, complaining.  I was happy to see the calendar picture for today, because it gave me some much needed levity:
 
 
I've seen this shoe in lots of various places, but still giggled when it popped up today.  It's a slide shoe shaped like a slide!  I would have to have a very specific reason to wear these, but they do crack me up.  So I leave you with this today:  wear funny shoes occasionally, and come up with better stories for your loved ones' obits than that they liked to garden.
 

No comments:

Post a Comment