Tuesday, August 5, 2014

Random, Partially True Statements

So, the puppies are vegetarians and the hubby is an ass.  Neither of these statements is entirely true.  Hubby and I had a fight tonight, so I'm exercising my right to call him an ass.  Or a man baby.  Whichever.  I hate fights.  I hate conflicts, so fights always seem so much bigger than they are.  I'm fascinated by people who can fight, get it all out there, clear the air, and then be fine.  I avoid the conflict, wait until it builds up, and then yell a lot.  So we both yelled.  I don't feel like the air is cleared, and I don't really feel like we resolved anything.  Maybe we did?  I have no idea.  Ah...the joys of being passive aggressive.  I blame my Scandinavian heritage for that one.  And possibly also on being Lutheran.

The puppies aren't really vegetarians, either, but they do love their veggies.  At night when I make juice they come in the kitchen and love to snack on anything I will give them.  Their favorite is carrots and jicama.  They think they like kale, but they actually don't.  They get all ecstatic if some falls on the floor and race to see who can get it first, but then they invariably spit it out and look at me accusingly.  They also like veggie chips, the kind that are real vegetables that have been dehydrated.  The hubby buys them so he can have something crunchy since he no longer eats potatoes.  He hates the green beans, though, so the dogs get those.  How many dogs do you know who are just as excited about dried green beans as they are about milk bones?  They are funny.  And apparently take after their mama, because I will always take carrots, jicama, or dried green beans over milk bones...

On to veggie shoes!


Um...sweet potato shoe?  So, technically not a vegetable.  No wait, it's a root vegetable?  Whatever, these are disturbing no matter what you call them.


As are these.  Cabbage shoes with...what in the heck are they garnished with?  The caption said they would be perfect for  your next garden party.  Do me a favor, don't invite me to that party.
 

Iceberg lettuce baby booty with purple cabbage decoration.  It looks like actual iceberg lettuce, so...it's art?


These actually are art.  Cucumbers carved to look like shoes.  I think they're cute, but don't really know why someone made their cukes into shoes.
 

Awww..pea slippers.  Which are always better than pee slippers.


More veggie and veggie-adjacent slippers! Why is the corn so angry?


And veggie(-adjacent) flip flops.  Same faces...see the angry corn?  Flip flops still confuse me in that you stick your foot right on top of the pattern or the cute part.  Don't step on your veggies, people!
 

Finally we have shoes that look like someone threw up salad on them.  Don't throw up salad on someone's shoes if you can help it, ok?

Pseudo-vegetarian puppy-inspired shoes.  Who would have thought?

On another note, I DID make it to bed by 11:30 last night!  Go me!  And now it's after midnight again.  Oh well...baby steps, right?

1 comment:

  1. Just plain weird and some people obviously have too much time on their hands, ME

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