Sunday, May 28, 2017

Extremes

As has been happening too often lately, my good intentions for posting don't come to fruition.  Things have been busy and crazy as usual.  The hubby hasn't been feeling well and it's been stressful for both of us.  We've been working a lot and trying to sort out plans and back-up plans and back-up-back-up plans.  One of those is that I've been sending my resume out, hoping to find a job sooner rather than later.  It's frustrating.  I'm sure I won't be the first to tell you that looking for a job is a pain in the patootie.  I send out a million resumes (yay, hyperbole!) and they just float away into the ether.  I've gotten a few rejections, which sucks, but at least I hear something, but mostly I submit resumes and never hear anything.  I've had 1 phone interview which only lasted about 5 minutes and no.  Then I had an in-person interview for another company and I thought it went pretty well, but they didn't call back when they said they would and when they finally sent an email it said thank you, but we won't be inviting you back for a second interview.  I know there's no inflection in email, but it just sounded snarky (oh, and 2 years ago, according to a post that popped up on Facebook, I had an interview with a call committee that I thought went well and they thought I was having a mental breakdown of some sort...clearly I can't tell when interviews go well).  I've had a phone interview and an in-person for a job that I'm kind of excited about, but I'm not getting my hopes up.  And then there's another possibility that I'm trying not to think too much about because I don't know if it's an actual possibility or not. 

Between the job stuff, the hubby, the office, and a billion (less hyperbole) other details and events and craziness I've been struggling lately.  Here is a diagram of how I've been feeling for too long now:

                    Hope                               Hope                              Hope                             Hope
                                                                                                                                      /
                                                                                                                                  /
                                                                                                                              /
                                                                                                                          /
Despair                         Despair                              Despair                         Despair

I really wish there were some more time between the feelings of hope and when despair comes crashing back in.  That last part with the line is me.  I feel stretched tight between hope and despair right now.  My fingers are stretching desperately toward hope, but despair has a firm grip on my ankle and is yanking for all its worth.  As always, prayers are appreciated.  

Up and down, hope and despair, seems like today's shoes should be extremes as well, so I'm going with black and white.








I leave it up to you whether they're fun or frightening, happy or sad, or some other set of extremes.

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