Yikes

Yesterday The Bean tagged me on Facebook, showing me this video:

It's an exhibition happening in New York right now, you can read more about it here if you want.  You should watch the video because there are some crazy shoes in there.  Here are a few stills I found:

The colors are really cool.  That's the only good thing I can say about these.

This is both hilarious and absolutely ridiculous to me.  Makes me laugh AND roll my eyes.

Huh.  Interesting shape, but can you actually walk in them?  I'm guessing I would slide and fall on my patootie.

 

This might be the most normal one of the group.

I don't think these have heels.  I still need to find a pair like this and try them on because I can't wrap my brain around how these are physically possible.

The Bean thought we should go to New York and see the exhibit.  That would be awesome.  I just need to win the lottery and collect my winnings before the 17th when the exhibit ends!

Seems Fishy

A friend (a new friend!  Yay new friends!) posted this on my Facebook wall yesterday:

She said she was interested in knowing what I might write about it.  And I don't know what to write about this thing.  It's a fish shoe, obviously.  And it's fairly hideous.  It should be filed under WHY?  And WHO BUYS THIS??  Oh Nike, go home.  You're drunk.

You know I went in search of more:

Well these just look dead.  Depending on whose feet have been in them, they might smell dead, too.

Noooooo!  Poor fishies.  It said the sole slides back so you can feed them, but why would you make them slosh around while you danced on your stripper pole?  So wrong.

Also wrong.  That fish looks shocked to find it's been made into a shoe.

These at least have some whimsy.  And they're blue.  They're still a world of no, though.

Um...why?  Is there  Vegas showgirl outfit that this goes with?  Because I don't want to see it.

So, thanks, new friend for this crazy post that made me laugh!  I've decided her nickname on the blog will be The Canadian.  First, because she's Canadian and I'm not creative with the blog nicknames, and second, because THE Canadian (with the definitive article) sounds way cool, and she is way cool.

Ugly Sweaters

Guess what?  Today was National Ugly Christmas Sweater Day!  I don't have an ugly Christmas sweater, so I couldn't participate (although it's currently about 5 degrees, not counting windchill, so a sweater, regardless of beauty, is fairly necessary).  In honor of this very silly holiday I give you the following results from a search for "ugly Christmas sweater shoes:"

I'm just going to leave these here for you...you're welcome...

Crazy

OhMyGoodnessTodayWasCrazyNonStopNothingWentQuiteAsPlannedCanIGoToBedNowPlease?! Yeah, today was crazy.  The hubby was sick and stayed home, work was one thing after another after another, I have a major sinus headache, blah blah blah.  I got a lot done today, which is good, but I also feel like I was completely disjointed the entire day and I hope I didn't screw anything up in any major, unfixable way.  So, in honor of this crazy day, here are 5 crazy shoes that actually manage to make my day seem a little more normal:

So you can box with your feet?  In case a clown also wants to be a boxer?

This actually makes me giggle a little bit.  But would you constantly slip on the banana peel?

OK, that is just plain creepy.  Why?

Also why?  Once again I have to say:  Put down the glue gun and back away slowly.

I don't even know what is going on with these.  Because they weren't crazy enough someone thought it would be a super cool idea to put giant, blood shot eyes in the middle! Weird.

Hey, at least all of these make me feel marginally better about my day.

Memory Lane: 2013. 2014.

Happy Easter!

Christ is Risen!  Happy Easter!  Here are some shoes!

Oh, Irregular Choice...I'd love to know what kind of drugs you are on...

Um.  Who wears these?  Put down the glue gun and back away slowly.

Or these?  At least they are pretty colors?

Oh dear.  I really did have good intentions when I went looking for Easter shoes.  And the the results were really really frightening.  Poor little trapped bunnies.

At least these are marginally cuter.  The bunnies look a little sad, though.  And I just realized I ate zero chocolate on Easter.   I didn't go to church, and I didn't eat chocolate.  I officially suck at Easter.

I posted these last year (turns out I posted those Irregular Choice ones, too), but they're so bright and fun, and I needed a palate cleanser after the rest of this craziness.

These are cute, too, so at least we're ending on a decent note.

Memory Lane: 2013. 2014. 2015.

3 Things:

1. I made it through Lent with the 3 things!  I missed those 2 days, but made them up, so I didn't do too bad.  And now I will stop subjecting you to this part of the blog.  I should probably tell you all of the deep things I learned about gratitude by doing this, but I'm just too tired to think straight.
2. We finished at the old house today!  Done.  Yay!
3. Christ is risen!  We celebrate the promises of the resurrection once again!

Lolly Lolly Lolly

Do you remember School House Rock!?  I watched (and loved) it as a kid, and then my mom bought the series on VHS so the nieces have seen them all as well.  The other day the hubby was singing Lolly, Lolly, Lolly, Get Your Adverbs here, so it's been stuck in my head.  It frequently gets stuck there and I frequently sing it using all kinds of 2 syllable words:  Puppies, Puppies, Puppies, Get Your Puppies Here, or Dragons, Dragons, Dragons...you know, whatever I'm thinking of at the time.  If you don't know what I'm talking about, here is the video:

Adverbs, as I'm sure you know, modify verbs, and often end in the letters ly.  So here are my adverb inspired shoes for you today:

Shoe is a noun, but shod is a verb, so your feet can be brightly shod.  All of the shoes in today's post are ones I found by typing in the adverb + shoes and seeing what popped up.

Your feet can be obnoxiously shod.  What the hell IS this thing?

They can be elegantly shod.  I like this shoe; it's going in my imaginary wedding closet.

Ooooh...your feet can be warmly shod.  These look so snuggly!

Baby feet can be happily shod.

There was a period of time when about 15 people shared these to my Facebook page.  Apparently they were either all dog lovers or they wanted my feet to be foolishly shod.

You already know that I'm a big dork, and now you know that I'm an even bigger dork and a grammar nerd, one who writes blog posts about adverbs.

Weird Day

As far as random holidays go, July 27th is a good day.  First, did you know that it's Take Your Pants for a Walk Day?  I didn't either, but now we do.  I guess as long as you're wearing pants and walking, then you are celebrating this day properly.  I wore shorts today, so I think I failed.

I think I've posted these before, but they're still incredibly weird.

At least this combination isn't attached like above, but I think I may have just gone blind.  Why would anyone go here?

Today is also Bagpipe Appreciation Day.  I, for one, appreciate the heck out of bagpipes.  I know they aren't for everyone, but I'm a fan.  I like to pretend it's because I have Scottish ancestry.  You know, instead of muscle memory, ancestor memory?

Bagpipe socks.  I had no idea these existed.  I don't think my love of bagpipes extends to a burning desire to wear bagpipe socks, but I'm not judging those who do have that desire.

To celebrate Bagpipe Appreciation Day here is Amazing Grace on bagpipes and pipe organ.  It's not my favorite version, but it's pretty darn good.  Sadly for Take Your Pants for a Walk day, the bagpiper is wearing a kilt, but not all holidays can coincide perfectly.

Weird Wedges

The calendar has given me a couple of interesting choices in wedges this past week.

This one isn't bad, I like the color, and if it were just a regular wedge it would be really cute.  But the fringe is too much for me.  Although these are probably hilarious in motion.

 

Today's shoe is just crazy.  The top part is OK, but clearly that wasn't enough for this shoe designer.  No, there had 2 be another 2 layers.  It looks like the same shoe in both layers, just flipped around and with that strange red ball.  This is insane.  That's all I can think to say.

Obviously I had to go look for other interesting wedges.  I would say these are "interesting" in the Minnesota sense.

 

I find this one "interesting" in the actual interesting sense.  It's very geometric, and I like the colors.  Not sure I could walk in it, though.

 

These make me think of bridges.  Or legs.  Why do my feet need legs?

I kind of like these, too.

And this one.  I like the iridescence, but for myself I'd like a little more arch support.  And by more, I mean any.

Holy crap.  These are like the shoes of a serial killer.  A killer of Barbies, but it doesn't make it any less creepy.  Damn, who wears these?

 

Um...OK.  I guess if you're a big Pokemon fan then this shoe is for you?  And you'll always have your gaming device with you?  So weird.

That's all for tonight's edition of weird wedges with (insert a name that starts with W because otherwise the alliteration is ruined).  I'm going to pray the barbie shoes don't give me nightmares.